Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Katy's Musing: Insanity

My life is insane.

Most weeks, I write my Wednesday posts on Tuesday night and schedule them to appear on Wednesday. You can no doubt guess by the time this is turning up that it didn't happen this week. That's mainly due to lacking the brain cells to write anything. Seriously. I opened up my computer, typed "Katy's Musing:" and then proceeded to start and discard half a dozen very bad ideas. After 20 minutes of this, I gave up.

One thing that's suddenly on my mind is RWA's national conference, which opens in two weeks. Under normal circumstances, by two weeks out I have my packing list compiled, my schedule sketched out, handouts downloaded. I'm starting to be seriously geared up and I've begun thinking about my goals for the conference.

This year, not so much, because my life is insane.

Okay, I have started to compile the packing list, but it's still sketchy. I've glanced at the list of workshops, but there's only one I've marked as a must-attend: Robin LaFevers and Barbara Samuel, Beyond the Hero's Journey: Exploring Other Archetypes for Women. (Robin and Barbara are friends of mine, not to mention being two of the wisest women I know, so, hello, must-see workshop.) The rest of it's a blur.

I have no idea what my goal is for the conference itself. Maybe to relax, and step outside my day-to-day life, the one that's insane. Maybe to spend time with my writer friends, and absorb the experience of being with my tribe, the People Who Know What It's Like. The ones who know what's it's like to agonize over craft, obsess over grammar, and live vicariously through people they made up in their own heads. Maybe to let go of the goals and expectations and demands that make my life insane. 

Maybe I should let go of anything resembling a plan and let the conference take me where it will. Instead of planning on many workshops I ought to attend, consider no more than a handful that I really don't want to miss...and wing it for the rest.

Maybe I should just be, and let the insanity pass me by.